• RSS Feed

  • Free Skype Call

    Skype Me™!
  • Twitter

    NZbizadvice on Twitter
  • Testimonials

    "Mark has been working with me since May 2004 on many aspects of my business.

    He is very approachable & offers me practical advice and his communication skills are excellent. I would have to say Mark gives his all and is determined to help his clients succeed".

    Owner, Small Pet Shop

    "Mark Gwilliam and his team at Business Advisory Accounting & Tax Services has been my full service accounting department for many years for my companies.

    I rely on the fast, friendly and accurate information they provide me to analyse and concentrate on running my business. Any information that I need is readily available. To eliminate the costs and hassles of in-house accounting, I highly recommend Mark's team."

    Owner, Medium sized building business
  • Recommended business products

    Domain Registrations starting at $9.98* Stock Photos, Royalty Free Stock Photography, Photo Search

Archive for October, 2008

Terms associated with ongoing financial meltdown

Given all of the problems with the current global financial markets, you might like to reacquaint yourselves with the following terms:

CEO –Chief Embezzlement Officer

CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer

BULL MARKET — A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius

BEAR MARKET — A 6 to 18-month period when the kids get no allowance ; the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex

VALUE INVESTING — The art of buying low and selling lower

P/E RATIO — The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing

BROKER — What my broker has made me

STANDARD & POOR — Your life in a nutshell

STOCK ANALYST — Idiot who just downgraded your stock

STOCK SPLIT — When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves

FINANCIAL PLANNER — A guy whose phone has just been disconnected

MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks

CASH FLOW — The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet

YAHOO — What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share

WINDOWS — What you jump out of when you’re the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR — Past year investor who’s now locked up in a nuthouse

PROFIT — An archaic word no longer in use

Email this article   Print This Post Print This Post
Submit to:
Fatal error: Call to undefined function the_bookmark_links() in /home/markg260/public_html/wp-content/themes/mg/archive.php on line 39